Do you enjoy being drenched in the stench of poop all day long?

Do you enjoy walks around the block in the wee hours of the morning?

Do you enjoy long working hours in a high-decibel environment?

If you think sleep is for the weak, that showers are overrated and enjoy being underappreciated, then look no futher!

This job lets you further develop useful and critical skills such as pillow, plate, runny-nose wiper.

We offer:


0-Pay or days off

0-Tolerance for logic

0-Consideration for your health or well-being!

So what are you waiting for? Contact your local sperm donor today!”

She chuckled.

Her husband looked up from his laptop. “What’s so funny?”

“Nothing,” she said. “It’s sad actually.” She looked at her one-year old who was slowly picking pasta out of her hand. At least I can add ‘plate’ to my resumé…


This story actually borders on nonfiction as evidenced by the picture 🙄

*If you enjoyed this post, check out more of my fiction here.*

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